Whats the BIG DIFFERENCE between title and bond?
Well, first of all a Title is for all the “Make Me official” bitches. This is seen as a way to reassure someone that the love you have for them is defined and laid on the table. Many females use this to validate their relationship. Nothing wrong with that at all.
Now, a Bond is defined as “conjoined, or joined securely to something.” This is for the broads who vibe & ride.
Personally, I can relate more with bonds than titles. Although, I’ve strived for titles over bonds, I’ve quickly realized that I’m not a “Title” type bitch. I’m more of a “Issa vibe” type bitch. I like the feeling, I like to enjoy the person rather than label it.
I can already hear all the crabby crab apple bitter bitches like :
Well, Bitch. Let me tell you something. Here are 4 things I’ve learned about the “Title over Bond” Obsession, and it is indeed an OBSESSION.
1.) “Title obsession” stems from a hungry ego.
Lets be 100, 9/10 women are worried about making sure they are the “Main” or only female that man is dealing with. It is COMMON belief that having a title will eliminate any strife about who you are and what place you hold in that man’s life. Title is needed to let YOU and others know where you stand. Your ego is STARVED…
HONEY….. DON’T YOU KNOW THAT…..
2.) The Title wont make the relationship ANY BETTER.
A TITLE IS ONLY AS GOOD AS THE RELATIONSHIP. If you can feel that something is off with the nigga, or he isn’t treating you the way you THINK you should be treated.. Sisssss.. let him go. “He’s only with me, he says i’m his girlfriend.”
Sis that man won’t even let you post him or introduces you as his friend to the waitress, Let it go… You know better. If you want to become a girlfriend, you need to make it be known.
3.) The Title is in the bond.
This kind of leads into the fourth thing, but honestly the title is in the bond. You can tell a man’s intentions by how he deals with you. Drop that nigga thats telling you “you can’t stay at my apartment tonight because I’m going out.” Bihhhhh.
4.) ANYONE who genuinely wants to be with you, will let the world know. The man will have you by his side for whatever,whenever. You will always feel wanted! You are smart, beautiful, and amazing. You can tell a “she’s a friend” vibe from a “this my girl” vibe. You won’t have to play the “what are we” game! Sis, don’t beg and pester a nigga for a Title. The title will be there by association and you will KNOW. You won’t ever have to ask for clarification. A MAN that wants to be WITH YOU and BUILD WITH YOU will make the bond known, will make sure you both are on the same page.
If Not, Let It Go.
Let me be clear: I do not mean indulge in a fruitless “bond.”
I am saying its important to have a connection with the person you are dealing with. Your feelings are waaaay more important than how you APPEAR to everyone else. If you both know what you’re doing together, and its mutual without a title, by any means PURSUE IT. If y’all are chilling on the daily, and he’s enjoying you in private but not in public, you’re thinking “we” and he’s thinking “me,” LET IT GO. Do not let any man (or anyone in general) drag you along. You are not some bimbo that he can have as he pleases.
In my experience, I’ve been through almost every kind of relationship. The ones where the man sees you as his possession, of course without a title, the one where he’ll give you a title, and still have another bitch with the exact same title as you, etc. Those are not bonds. Those aren’t even relationships. The bonds and relationships I’m describing are the ones where you feel comfortable always, you can go wherever with your person and not worry about anything or being hurt in any way, basically vibing. When you both are ready to give it a name, it will come. Don’t force anything.
You deserve a bond AND a title. I firmly believe that both are absolutely necessary. I just believe everything has a time. If you ask “but what if you’re ready for more, and he’s not? What if he’s not giving you a title because he’s trying to keep his options open?” If you have the relationship where you can’t talk about how you feel and be completely sure at every stage in your relationship, its probably not a relationship you need to be in anyway.
What is it that you crave more? Is it the title, the name, the feeling of knowing WHO you are? Or is it the companionship? The vibe, the actual feelings you get from the person?